Tuesday, September 28, 2010

House M. D. Quotes - Season 7 Episode 2 - Selfish

Dr. Lisa Cuddy : Well, that's why I plan on doing some talking first. (She pats his arm). I want us to formerly report our relationship to Human Resources.
Dr. Gregory House :Okay. You get them, I'll cover everybody else. (He pushes the elevator button with the tip of his cane).
Dr. Lisa Cuddy : I would appreciate it if we could keep it quiet until we had that meeting.
Dr. Gregory House :It's gonna be hard with me grabbing your ass all day.



Dr. Gregory House :I'm seeing Cuddy. (All heads up). Generally, without her clothes on. Use your imagination. Hope it's got a wide-angle lens. (He chuckles. They all stare at him, looking confused. He takes back the file Wilson was reading). You don't actually need that.
Dr. James Wilson :I'm gonna check my office for whoopee cushions.
Dr. Gregory House :This is not a prank.
Dr. James Wilson :This is not me walking out the door. (He leaves).



Dr. Chris Taub : Are you sure it a good idea to be yanking on the chain of command?



Dr. Gregory House :I agree. It's weird of me not to care. So either I'm a changed man because of Cuddy, or I'm pretending to be a changed man because I do know something about Thirteen and I'm trying to throw you off the scent, or I've just gone nutty bananas because I lost a patient. All of which you are free to discuss (Articulating) after I get a diagnosis.



Dr. Eric Foreman : How about just telling her we're planning this stupid test? And I'm hoping House and Cuddy are more than just a fling. It's clearly mellowed him out. He didn't even care about Thirteen.
Dr. Chris Taub : Right. The guy who ordered us to stop the patient's heart has mellowed out. It's gonna be horrible because it's doomed, which is just gonna make House 50 times more of a crank.



Dr. James Wilson :Yes, the lack of dime-store pranks is proof that you're actually dating Cuddy, and not just mocking me for being worried about you.
Dr. Gregory House :What do I have to do to prove this to you? Tattoo a cane on her inner thigh? Tattoo her inner thigh on my cane? (Cuddy enters).



Dr. Gregory House :Come on. One peck. Just enough to arouse him a little.
Dr. James Wilson :I – hey, I'm not even...
Dr. Gregory House :I didn't mean you.



Dr. James Wilson :I've been more passionate with my great aunt.
Dr. Gregory House :Mabel? Up high!



HR guy : How would you describe the exact nature of the relationship?
Dr. Gregory House :You ever see Wild Kingdom? Those insects that rip their partner's heads off after copulating? (He turns to Cuddy for approval. There is an akward silence. Ernest Griffin considers this and starts to write it down. Cuddy, who was preparing to speak, stops and looks startled.)
Dr. Lisa Cuddy : It's a sexual relationship.
Dr. Gregory House :Go slowly now. He's writing it down.



Dr. Gregory House :So what could cause her heart to stop and her urine not to drop?
Dr. Chris Taub : House, I was expecting your relationship with Cuddy to complicate our work long-term. (House turns back, gives him a patient, fake-polite look). I am now concerned it might be affecting us short-term. All due respect.
Dr. Gregory House :None taken. I listen to Cuddy all the time. She's my boss. Also yours, by the way.
Dr. Chris Taub : You'd listen, then tell her she's being an idiot, and do whatever you want.
Dr. Gregory House :I find I can skip the idiot part when she's not being an idiot, and since the scare test would have led to the same dead end, she was right to stop it. Which means your problem's about you.
Dr. Chris Taub : This should be interesting.



Dr. Gregory House :Losers love company. And if even a misanthrope like me has a chance at happiness, it's gonna be pretty lonely on that landfill of loserdom you call a marriage. (Taub looks a little hurt, Foreman smiles. House opens the patient's file). Heart, kidneys, go.



Sidney :He has tingling in his feet and his legs. I want a full battery of tests.
Dr. Gregory House :Carbon dating?



Dr. Gregory House :Well, that's true, he's definitely had his jowls done. Statistically, if he didn't have these symptoms, he'd be like most people of his age — dead for the past several decades.
Maurice :Do the tests. I'm sick.
Dr. Gregory House :You have a bad case of natural causes.
Sidney :Do the damn tests.
Dr. Gregory House :If the vial fills with sand, we take that as a bad sign.



Dr. Gregory House :What other problem could there be with a problem-free procedure? Boy's sports, science club, she's living his life, not hers. (He puts the file away, takes another, looks at Taub). Makes sense she's being a self-denying moron.
Dr. Chris Taub : She loves her brother. She's thinking selflessly. How is that at all—
House: Being moronic? Mm. If I can only think of a harm-free medical treatment she turned down lately.
Dr. Chris Taub : You're right. If everyone were more selfish, the world would be a better place.
Dr. Gregory House :See? I can skip the idiot part when you're not being an idiot. (He turns to leave the Clinic. Wilson is leaning in the doorframe, arms crossed, with a huge smile on his face).



Dr. Gregory House :Yeah, I had that same facial expression for the first 47 hours. Had another one too, but only for 15 seconds at a time. (They pass the door and walk together, as usual).



Della : I am. Sort of. Um, I got into skateboarding when some of Hugo's classmates did, and he realized he could never do it. (She looks outside of the room, where Chase is talking to her parents and Hugo). It's the same with a lot of things. We live through it together.
Dr. Chris Taub : And you're not worried you're being selfless to the point of self-denial?
Della : You've never been inspired by someone?



Dr. Gregory House :Yeah (Wilson looks genuinely surprised). I have to avoid this problem. If I can restrict our interactions to places where neither of us are wearing pants...
Dr. James Wilson :Yeah, that's not avoiding the problem, that's avoiding the issue.
Dr. Gregory House :Since avoidance is my plan for dealing with the issue, technically, that's not avoiding it. (He seems relieved). Thanks.
Dr. James Wilson :No problem.



Dr. Lisa Cuddy : Maybe we should plan on lunch tomorrow.
Dr. Gregory House :Problem is, at lunch you tend to wear tops.(Cuddy smiles widely. He lifts the sheet and takes a look). This is much better. (Cuddy laughs. He smiles and kiss her forehead, then lifts himself and prepares to kiss her properly. The phone rings. Cuddy frowns. He reaches for his phone and answers. During the whole conversation, Cuddy caresses his forearm and traces one of his veins).
Dr. Gregory House :Cuddy and I are naked. So I'm having trouble focusing. Use small words.
Foreman (He and Chase are in the lab, near a computer screen) : Kidney biopsy was clean, so we rechecked the piece of her lung from the O.R.
Dr. Gregory House :You lost me. Sorry, who is this calling again?



Dr. Eric Foreman : If we give steroids for rejection, it'd make an infection worse. If we give antibiotics for infection, it'd make rejection worse.
Dr. Gregory House :Which worse is worse?
Dr. Robert Chase:If we treat for infection and we're wrong, she'll be dead within hours.
Dr. Gregory House :And if we treat for rejection and we're wrong?
Dr. Chris Taub : She'll probably hang on a day or two.



Maurice :Skip the blood work. (House suppress a smile). Tell my son it's grim news. I need to be in a nursing home. A private room. (Pause) Make it a suite.



Cuddy : I sit around on my bureaucratic ass?
Dr. Chris Taub : I was relaying your words.
Dr. Gregory House :I said well-formed. I said well-formed! (to Taub) What were you—



Dr. Gregory House :Stop. I agree with you (He gives a little sigh. Taub is speechless). That was our analysis from the start. (to Taub) If you've got a problem with a team decision, you come to me. (to Cuddy, sheepishly) I'm sorry. I-I'll deal with him later. (Pleadingly) I said well-formed.



Dr. Gregory House :People who have not seen Cuddy naked should not throw stones.
Maurice :She does have great cans. (House gives him a look).



Dr. Robert Chase:Did it ever occur to you that House is just happy and could give a crap about other people's lives because of it?
Dr. Chris Taub : Well, that's ironic and depressing. And by that logic, the reason you don't give a crap is because you're happy, which means you've got someone new giving you chew toys.
Dr. Robert Chase:You're one-fourth right.
Dr. Chris Taub : Wait. Are you saying... (pagers beep) You're dating four women?



Dr. Robert Chase:It is LAM. The tests were positive.
Dr. Gregory House :Then the tests have to be wrong.



Dr. Gregory House :Damage has a way of spreading to everyone around you. For example, your obvious emotional damage is now making me have a philosophical conversation instead of dealing with your sister. See how that might be damaging?



Dr. Gregory House :Yeah, we get it. Your brother, the Saint. His sister, the Martyr. (He leaves the room. Taubs runs after him).



Dr. Gregory House :She has a nasty case of sickle cell trait. Her heart arrhythmia wasn't sudden at all. Screwed-up blood cells screwed-up the blood vessels, which gave us a screwed-up positive for LAM. If she'd told us about her symptoms sooner — like ever — she might not be dying. You were right after all.
Dr. Chris Taub : I never said sickle—
Dr. Gregory House :If everyone were more selfish, the world would be a better place.
Dr. Chris Taub : So she's gonna die.



Dr. Gregory House :I guess I can just chat with them about the weather. Blood tests just confirmed sickle cell trait. So they might be curious about the only treatment option. Though we are having weird weather lately.
Dr. Lisa Cuddy : There is a huge reason not to take lungs from living patients.
Dr. Gregory House :So their siblings can die?



Dr. Gregory House :Maybe. (Raises eyebrows and admits it) Yeah. I think so. This is screwing me up. Why is it not screwing you up?
Cuddy : It is. I don't know why I okayed you foaming that lung. I realized it was wrong as soon as I said it.
Dr. Gregory House :I knew it! I knew 'cause you tilted your head.



Dr. Gregory House :Bizarrely, it explains all your symptoms. Better-fitting dentures, you'll be fine. Medically, there's no reason to go anywhere... Hospital rebate. You might wanna... put it towards couples therapy.



Dr. Lisa Cuddy : Don't put this on them.
Dr. Gregory House :What do you mean, put it on? It is on them! As much as they may wanna pass the lung here!
Dr. Lisa Cuddy : Of course they do! You're handing them an impossible choice.
Dr. Gregory House :Life has handed them a crappy choice, and they're picking the crappier option — trading who knows how many healthy decades for four or five years in which roller boy will be a limp rag.



Hugo :I want you to take half my lung.
Della : No. I'm not.
Hugo :You do so many great things. I just watch. I get to watch and coach and cheer. But that's not me out there. It never will be. If you take this piece of me, carry it with you... then I really can share in everything you do. (The parents stare at them). This is the great thing I can do with my life. Don't make me live without you.



Dr. Gregory House :We got lucky. I did give them an impossible choice. The kid took it away from them.
Dr. Lisa Cuddy : That fight... was the first honest interaction you and I have had since we came back to work. If we are painfully, brutally honest with each other, maybe we'll get lucky again.
Dr. Gregory House :You've got a big ass. (He grabs it. Cuddy smiles at him, intertwines her fingers with his on her bottom, takes his hand and leads him to the elevator).

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

House M. D. Quotes - Season 7 Episode 1 - Now What?

Dr. Robert Chase : Yet you're the only person here without a potential case in front of you.
Dr. Remy Hadley : I haven't found the right one yet.
Dr. Robert Chase : Oh. I–I thought maybe it was because you were asking for a leave of absence and wouldn't have time to see a case through.
Dr. Chris Taub : I didn't say anything.
Dr. Robert Chase : He didn't...I saw an envelope on House's desk with your name on it, so naturally, I... steamed it open.
Dr. Eric Foreman : What's wrong with you? You steam an envelope to keep it secret.
Dr. Eric Foreman : Which is why I just ripped it. You gonna tell us where you're going?
Dr. Remy Hadley : Sure sounds like a no.



Dr. Gregory House : This is important. Right now, we are more important than what's going on at the hospital. So...I say we turn off our phones and... give the morning to us.



Dr. Gregory House : I am going to make you a magical bath. It will have bubbles and eastern spices and blue diamonds and green clovers... transformative powers. But… I must have solitude to focus my creative energies.



Dr. Lisa Cuddy : Don't do this. Why do you have to analyze things to death? Why can't you just... let it be nice?


Dr. Gregory House : If an EMT calls in with a brain or spinal trauma, just divert them to the nearest hospital. All you gotta do is stand around and keep the E.R. open. It's an administrative problem, not a medical one.
Dr. Robert Chase : House, where the hell are you?
Dr. Gregory House : Great. Glad you're on it... All systems go!



Dr. Eric Foreman : Why are you going to Rome? I found the flight information in your locker.
Dr. Remy Hadley : I love how everyone thinks it's so quaint and childlike of me to expect a modicum of privacy around here.
Dr. Eric Foreman : Your flight's tomorrow. What's so urgent in Rome?
Dr. Remy Hadley : I hear they want to tear down the Coliseum to build a karaoke bar.



Dr. Remy Hadley : You read my note. You go through my locker. And then you decide you want to round it off by lecturing me on my life choices?



Dr. Gregory House : Well, last night was emotional for you. We both lost that patient. We watched people die. I came back here and I went for the Vicodin, and you... dumped your fiancé and you came here.
Dr. Lisa Cuddy : Which I don't regret.
Dr. Gregory House : I'm not saying you do. I'm just saying it was an impulsive move.



Dr. Lisa Cuddy : The secret bath is... burning my lady parts.
Dr. Gregory House : How do you think my anus feels? Burning means it's working.



Alex : Dr. Cuddy's first assignment was for me to get to know everything about Dr. House's team... and not to believe anything any of them told me.
Dr. Robert Chase : I'm... not a neurosurgeon?



Dr. Robert Chase : Cuddy's assistant decided to use his own brain. Who put that idiot idea into his head?
Dr. Gregory House : Perhaps you could follow the same advice.
Dr. Robert Chase : He notified DPH that there's no neurosurgeon on the premises. Said he legally had to, which he legally had to.
Dr. Gregory House : Sounds like you got the situation under control.
Dr. Robert Chase : No. I don't. You know I don't. When DPH shows up, they're gonna shut down our E.R. This can't be fixed. It is what it is, House.
Dr. Gregory House : Great. I've got every faith in your ability to solve the problem.



Dr. Gregory House : No! He's like a stray... he'll eat everything, shed all over the place, and crap on the floor... Hi. This is Gregory House. I can't take your call at the moment. Please leave a message. If this is Wilson, I'm fine, not suicidal, not on drugs, coping very well with the loss of my last patient. So feel free to go about your day without worry. Beep!
Dr. James Wilson :House. You can't just not show up to work. What's Cuddy gonna say?
Dr. Gregory House : If this is still Wilson... she gave me the day off. And tomorrow. Okay, maybe not tomorrow. But today. I'm fine. Now, go away. Beep!



Dr. Remy Hadley : You're pretty miserable, aren't you? Would you be willing to take a... fairly risky drug if it would make it all go away?



Dr. Robert Chase : Have you read the list of side effects on those drugs? We could crash his BP.
Dr. Remy Hadley : I haven't heard a thump, so I assume he's still quietly puking.
Dr. Robert Chase : We could be making him worse.
Dr. Remy Hadley : Bigger picture — we're making the hospital better. We can test for whatever you want to test him for once he's stable enough to get back to the hospital. Now, stop being a girl and move. So you gonna ask me about this Huntington's trial, and by ask, I mean give me your opinion?
Dr. Robert Chase : No. There is one thing, though. Will you have sex with me?
Dr. Remy Hadley : What?
Dr. Robert Chase : Well, this trial means you're leaving right away. I was playing a long game. Deadlines have been moved up.



Dr. James Wilson :You do seem okay. You want me to stick around? I could do my usual thing of pretending I like watching monster truck rallies, if that would make you feel better.


Dr. James Wilson :House... you could have died. You had a patient who did die in your arms. You shouldn't be alone.
Dr. Gregory House : I know. That's why I called a hooker. Now, go away. 'Cause... you'll be extra.
Dr. James Wilson :Are you really okay?
Dr. Gregory House : Are you gonna break in again? You checked my pulse. You checked my pupils. I'll mail you the urine sample.



Dr. Remy Hadley : Yadda, yadda. You don't think I should do it. Message heard.
Dr. Chris Taub : No. I approve. Living fast and dying young is crap. If you have a chance to get better... I say good for you.



Dr. Robert Chase : You do know we still have a sick patient here. Right? He's the guy sitting right behind you, taking off his clothes again.


Dr. Richardson : Not exactly stuck... I snuck out... Freedom is my birthright!



Dr. Remy Hadley : Did you eat any roe? Little tiny eggs?
Dr. Richardson : Nummy!
Dr. Remy Hadley : Toad eggs will cause nausea, and they can get you high. If I'm right, the antidote is fast-acting. If we can get him to keep his clothes on long enough, he can pass as a functioning neurosurgeon.


Dr. Gregory House : It's all there. All you gotta do is click confirm, and we're eating croissant and being insulted by stinky people this time tomorrow. Don't worry. I used Wilson's credit card.
Dr. Lisa Cuddy : I can't.
Dr. Gregory House : I'm kidding. I used your credit card.



Dr. Gregory House : The hospital does not need your body. I do.
Dr. Lisa Cuddy : So does my daughter.
Dr. Gregory House : Well, she can come too. Or to grandmother's house she can go.





Dr. Richardson : What if it doesn't work? What if I stay this way forever?
Dr. Remy Hadley : The antidote works quickly. If we're right, you should be back to your old self in no time.
Dr. Richardson : My old self was boring. Can't we keep the new self?
Dr. Remy Hadley : Just lay down, and stop unbuttoning.



Dr. Eric Foreman : Do you have anyone going with you to Rome?
Dr. Remy Hadley : Is that your passive-aggressive way of asking me if I'm seeing somebody else?
Dr. Eric Foreman : I hope you are. I mean... I hope you have someone with you. If I'm scared about this, I can't imagine how you must feel. You shouldn't be alone. If you want... I could fly over for a few days. Friends.
Dr. Remy Hadley : I appreciate that, but I think I'll be okay. I guess we took the long way around to being friends, huh?
Dr. Richardson : I guess we all did.




Dr. Gregory House : No. But I can see the past. And you're gonna remember all the horrible things I've done, and you're gonna try to convince yourself that I've changed. And I'm gonna start doing those horrible things again, because I haven't changed. Then you'll realize that... I'm an insane choice for someone who has a kid. And from there, it's a short step to the inevitable conclusion that all of this... was a mistake. Tell me any of that isn't true.



Dr. Robert Chase : Speaking of which... Earlier today I asked you about... having sex. You gave me a look that almost certainly could only mean no. However, on the other hand, I'd be remiss if I... didn't follow up and confirm. See? It's the same look. So if it didn't mean no the first time, then...
Dr. Remy Hadley : No. No. No, no. No.
Dr. Robert Chase : Okay. No pressure.
Dr. Remy Hadley : Does that method ever work?
Dr. Robert Chase : At least once.





Dr. Gregory House : I've done horrible things to you. And I'll do horrible things again to you. But because of one stupid moment with a dying girl and a pile of rubble... you think I can change. Tell me where I'm wrong.
Dr. Lisa Cuddy : I don't want you to change. I know you're screwed up. I know you are always gonna be screwed up. But you're the most incredible man I've ever known. You are always gonna be... the most incredible man I have ever known. So unless you're breaking up with me, I am going home now.


Thursday, September 09, 2010

One of Riley's Rare Smiles

It took a long while. But at last, we got another rare smile for a split-second:




And we continue to wait for more of these moments. :)

- via BlogPress in iPhone